The future....

Do you ever wish you had a crystal ball? Do you ever wish God would whisper the secrets of tomorrow in your ear? Oh come on...I KNOW you do! Everyone does. What does the future hold? How will this situation turn out? I've been doing a lot of thinking and praying about the future this week. I mentioned the desire to go back to teaching a few weeks ago in a post. Well...I might have that opportunity.
The local preschool has contacted me. Their director has decided that she would rather follow her heart and limit herself to teaching and not directing the preschool. The school would like to grow, and with the current director's qualifications, they aren't allowed to do this (state regulations, etc). The current director is a wonderful Christian lady, and awesome teacher! She knows that the program cannot grow with her in the lead, so she is stepping down and going to her first love, the children. The day that she announced to the board her decision, I received 2 phone calls from the board, and one from the current director. They wanted to know my background, education, experience, etc. The director and I have become friends over the two years my children have been in her class, and she wanted me to know she was recommending me to the board as her replacement.
Well...I have a meeting with the board tomorrow afternoon. They have not offered me a job, nor have I accepted. I have too many questions, but my mind is just swirling...even after knowing this information for 6 days.
Here are some of the things swirling in my brain...

1. I don't want to put Bethany in child care. My dad says it's no big deal...but this is one hurdle I keep coming back to. She will be in the 4 yo program, which will be 4 or 5 afternoons a week, so she would only need care in the morning. According to our state regulations, the director must be there all hours of operation...so I would have to be there mornings and afternoons (if they want me as director...maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here???) Is it fair to her to have her in child care when her brother and sister never had to do that?
   
2. Would I even get to teach? Would my time be filled with "director" duties? By the way, what are the director duties? Would I even have time to be able to teach one of the age groups??? Am I organized enough to keep everything strait that I would need?
   
3. The preschool is run by a church, a Christian church, but it is not our church. I am a certified Lutheran school teacher. That means that I took courses in college to certify me with our church body, I have a certain status with our church body. Since I have been a SAHM for the past (almost) 8 years, my status has been moved from active to inactive, but I am still on the roster. Would I have to give up my roster? If so, what would I need to do to get it back in the event we move somewhere with Lutheran schools? Would I be able to teach "Jesus time" to children in this preschool? I know you don't go deep into theology with 3 & 4 yo, but there is always a hint of theology no matter what Bible story you teach. Would I be allowed to teach what I believe?
   
4. Abbigail and Andrew are mainly concerned with who would take them and pick them up from school. I don't think this would be an issue (one of the current teachers has a daughter in elementary school, and I see her at drop off/pick up all the time).
5. There are the obvious questions about salary/benefits, but honestly they aren't very high on my list of concerns.

What a joy it would be to be back in the classroom again. I think if they were offering me just a teaching position that would simply be while Bethany was in another class...I would jump at it. Right now I cannot honestly say which way I will go if they offer me the directorship. I know my own fears and self-doubt are playing a large part in my hesitation.

I pray God gives me discernment to decide what is best for my family, the preschool, and me. I pray He calms my fears and gives me confidence. I pray He makes it clear which path I should take. I also pray that He will help to quiet my mind so I can get a decent night's rest...which I haven't been doing lately. I know it's already 12:35, and I'm still not in bed, so the good night's rest is already out of the question, but a decent one would be nice! ;o)

Well...I'm heading to bed for that rest now...I'll write another post tomorrow after the meeting, if I can form coherent sentences (I know, my sentences are rarely coherent, but I do my best!!! :o))